Jan 28, 2011

Get to Know a D-Bag: Wazzu

Apologies on the lack of posts regarding the recent football commit blitz that has Coach Sark reaming the rest of the Pac-10 (especially Wazzu), I'm out of the country and getting legit internet has been a real Barbara Hedges. I'll definitely be highlighting our new commits after signing day. Fortunately, Sarkisianity is stateside rocking DSL and a Grade A snarky asshole streak:

It’s that time of year again, friends.  The time when we send Romar and the boys off to the far reaches of our state and pray that they don’t come back with crabs and a Natty Ice dependency.  This far-off land, this untamed southeastern corner of our fair state is everything we aren’t. 

Robust culture, diverse communities, and running water are things those of us fortunate enough to reside outside of Pullman sometimes take for granted.  And yet, every season, we punish our squad by sending them there. 

Now, I believe this trip serves a purpose.  Similar to the life lessons articulated in the 1978 film Scared Straight or in this more recent SNL sketch, the annual trip to Pullman serves as a reminder to all who dare question how good they have it.  Tweets like, “damn, this phad thai from Thai Tom’s was TOO good…fml” or “way too many girls on this campus wear yoga pants..smh” pale in comparison to what we would see if they had the internet in Pullman: “Shit, just realized I live in Pullman #suicidehotline!”

Now, don’t misunderstand what I’m saying.  I don’t necessarily think our squad undervalues being a part of the UW program.  I just don’t think it hurts to put your blessings in context from time to time.  And let me tell you, a couple nights in Pullman provide a fuck-ton of context. 

If you look closely, you can just make out Martin Stadium.

This year’s pilgrimage to the Palouse should provide some fireworks.  Though they’ve cooled of late, the Kewgs started the season in a truly anti-kewg style, going 10-1 with a win over then #15 Baylor and an utter destruction of an under-performing Gonzaga team.  Their only loss came at the hands of then #5 Kansas State. 

Granted Baylor and Kansas State are now out of the rankings and appear to have been overrated, a 10-1 record was nonetheless impressive.  Since then, the Kewgs have returned to more familiar pastures, going 4-5 (4-4 in Pac-10 play).  Records aside, games in Pullman are rarely easy and I have no reason to expect Sunday’s contest to be any different.

The Kewgs are led by some familiar faces in Klay Thompson, DeAngelo Casto, and Reggie Moore.  Their undisputed leader, Thompson comes into the game averaging 22.2 points and 78 field goal attempts per game. 

Klay really worked on his awkward faces in the offseason.

The last time the Dawgs went to Pullman, Casto had a big game; putting up 19 points, grabbing 6 boards, and swatting his way to one whole block.  While that performance might be indicative of what he’s capable of, the Huskies have one key addition to this year’s squad. 

That addition is none other than the 7' 260lbs destroyer of men and former resident of Cap-Vert Peninsula, Aziz N’Diaye.  Aziz will undoubtedly get some help from the likes of MBA and Gant, but make no mistake, Casto vs N’Diaye is a key matchup in this game.  It also sounds like a final bout from Mortal Kombat.  Hopefully FSN can get a “N’Diaye Wins: FATALITY!” graphic put together before Sunday.

Since FSN reads at a 1st grade level, I decided to do it for them.

The third part of the Kewg triumvirate has really elevated the team to new highs…I mean levels.  Rainier Beach alum and cousin of Whoregon Duck Aaron Brooks, Reginald Lianitus Moore, has only played in 14 games this season, but has started in all but two of those.  Reggie has run into some legal issues this season, recently being cited for marijuana possession.  Though his misdeeds pale in comparison to those of his football counterparts, Reggie has admirably attempted to carry on a proud Wazzu tradition.   

"Shit! Cops!"

The Kewgs are led by second-year head coach and former Romar assistant, Ken “Ghostface Killah” Bone.  That nickname certainly doesn’t refer to Bone’s linguistic prowess, but rather to his pale, gaunt appearance.   As it's only Bone’s second season, the jury’s still out as to whether he can replicate the success of his predecessor, Tony Guy Bennett.  Bone certainly proved a capable assistant under Romar and to this day they remain friends.  Romar has repeatedly praised Bone as a fiery competitor and a skilled coach.  Strangely, Romar has never mentioned Bone’s love of the turtleneck…

"Wait, WSU is located where?"

While there’s not much to be said about the Kewg’s new head man, Wazzu’s student section is another story.  The Zzu Cru has a longstanding tradition as an elite group of students that strike fear into the hearts of visiting teams.  Actually, none of that’s true.  Not even the student part.  The Zzu Cru was created by the Wazzu Athletic Marketing Department in 2005 in order to boost attendance.  For a $20 fee, members receive a variety of perks. 

There are also season long attendance contests where members are bribed to attend games.  It’s the membership criteria however, that really set the Cru apart from other fan bases.  Unlike other student sections that impose arbitrary guidelines on their membership, such as being an actual student, the Zzu Cru has no such restrictions.  Straight from the horse’s mouth (or Wikipedia page) “[m]embers can be anyone from students to alumni, to visitors who just would like a shirt.” 

Now, I believe in giving props when props are due.  One thing the Cru has mastered in their infancy is the art of the cleverly-worded sign.  Designed to capture the interest of an FSN cameraman, these signs serve as a warning to fans of opposing teams, “don’t fuck with us, because we will double entendre the shit out of you.”  I’ve actually heard that Sign Making is a course offered by WSU’s vaunted Edward R. Murrow College of Communication. 

Now that’s clever!  How did you think of that?!


The Friel mentioned in both of those witty and unique signs is former Wazzu coach and the namesake of Friel Court, Jack Friel.  I’m sure Jack had no idea how useful his name would be for future generations.  He probably also had no idea that the school would be forced to hide their fans from view in order to make their games "TV appropriate."

The Paper Bagger of fan bases.

Get ready Dawg fans.  This should be a good one.  I’m predicting a scrappy contest, with IT continuing his hot streak and leading the Dawgs to victory.  The crowd should be more hostile than usual given how Steve Sarkisian just went all There Will Be Blood on Paul Wulff this past week and snagged commitments from two previous WSU commits, Stephan Nembot and Bishop Sankey.  Not to sidetrack this post, but keep an eye out for a Signing Day post coming out next week that will detail the fantastic work of Coach Sark and his staff. 

Back to basketball. The leadership of co-captains IT and J-Hol will be crucial in Sunday’s game.  Big time performances from seniors MBA and Venoy will also be deciding factors.  Make sure you stock up on the beverages on Saturday, because I expect all of you to not be legally able to drive by 10am on Sunday.  That’s right, 10:00 in the morning.  For a 7:00pm tip-off. Frkydawg knows what I'm talking about.  

Let’s go Dawgs!

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Jan 22, 2011

We Got to Know a D-Bag: ASU

This D-bag was a little late to the party, but longtime TDD resident and consummate gentleman, Sarkisianity, penned a beautiful post defiling those irritating Devils of the Sun that is far too enjoyable not to be displayed publicly.

As far as the game itself, the Dawgs played pretty sloppy defense which allowed ASU to light it up from beyond the arc, dropping 9 of 15 shots. Normally, those type numbers would propel a team to victory, but IT (19 points, 8 assists, 6 boards) and MBA (a career-high 30 points and 9 rebounds) made sure that didn't happen as UW wore down the Devils on their way to a 88-75 victory.

 "Get off me, son!"

The Dawgs are now 7-1 in the Pac-10 and 15-4 overall. Next up is a road game on the Palouse next Monday. Fellas, don't forget your iPods, iPads, laptops, etc, there ain't shit to do out there.

Take it away, Sarki!

Hello Dawg Fans!  I’m fucking back!  After an extended hiatus, I’ve returned to discuss yet another phallic-obsessed, mustachioed molester.  Over the past several months we’ve come to know the Virginia Cavalier and the San Francisco Don.  While both those mascots have certainly registered with their local sheriff’s office, the new kid on the block is about to put them all to shame.

The Dawgs put on quite a show on Thursday.  Showing incredibly versatility, the Huskies threw down highlight reel dunks, engaged in some deep sharpshooting (my new favorite innuendo), and even busted out the slip ‘n slide for a play.  I also noticed that the Athletic Department generously gave courtside seats to what appeared to be a school field trip.  Gestures like that make me even more proud to be a Husky.  Not sure why those assholes all dressed in Arizona gear though...ungrateful douchebags.

Anyway, the Dawgs have a home game on Saturday against those denizens of the desert, the Arizona State Sun Devils.  In the opinion of this fan, these sandy flamers have been possibly the most irritating Pac-10 opponent over the last few years.  Consistently mediocre players like Ty Abbott, Rihards Kuksiks, and Jeff Pendergraph all seemed to snort ten lines of cocaine and put on all-conference performances against the Dawgs.  

This however, pales in comparison to the elite level of “fuckwaddery” exhibited by by the bitches of bitches, Derek Glasser.  Derek is in some choice company in this regard; joined only by Aaron Brooks and Taylor Rochestie, he has cemented himself as an abhorrent, little shitdragon.  Fortunately for Dawg fans, we have a player named Venoy Overton.  Time and time again, VO drank the shit out of GlassyBaby’s milkshake.

"No, don't help me up. The view from down here is delightful."

 “Nobody questions the GlassMan’s limbo skillz!”

Fortunately, this year’s version of the desiccated melanomas is significantly less bitchy.  Though Ty Abbott and Rihards “It’s Latvian!” Kuksiks are still on the team, the loss of all-world tools like Jeff Pendergraph and Derek Glasser cut the team’s douche ratio in half.  I’m not sure if I’ve made this clear enough.  I despise Derek Glasser.  Apparently there are people out there who like him, as evidenced by this gem:

Just another Tuesday in the Glasser home.

Lack of legitimate academics aside, this “university” had the audacity to double up with the worst mascot in the Pac-10.  I know, the Stanford Cardinal might give it a run for its money, but c’mon folks…a Sun Devil?  That literally means nothing.  Is that a well tanned co-ed with HPV?  Perhaps some sort of desert-dwelling reptile?  No, it’s neither of those things.  It’s this dickhole…

 Don’t hate on these gloves, Coach Herb’s semen is a bitch to wash off.

Now, I know this flame-banger looks like a serial molester/arsonist.  His four segment mustache and insanely oversized grin really establish his position as a late-night terror of children everywhere.  His go to gesture is also the shocker.  At this point, he’s not even trying to hide it.

 Two in the toaster, one in the roaster.

Poor life choices aside, the administration at ASU could’ve have made a worse choice at mascot.  Sparky is way better than their original choice:

Though he lost out on the mascot gig, Lawrence is still heavily involved in recruiting.

These demonic sunstrokes are coached by none other than Wallace Shawn.  You may know Wallace from his work in the film industry.  Rumor has it that he’s researching a new role as a shitty basketball coach.  So, the TDD intern just fact checked that last statement.  Apparently, Wallace Shawn isn’t the basketball coach at ASU.  It’s some guy named Herb Sendek.

And Herb's voice is even more annoying.

Regardless of their coach’s level of celebrity, this year’s version of the fire ticklers shouldn’t present any problems for the Dawgs, especially in the newly-minted Alaska Airlines Arena.  I’m predicting a good old fashioned, balls deep, run ‘em outta the gym blowout.  IT will continue his hot streak and B-Sherr will get some solid minutes.

Prediction: 94-70 Dawgs

Go Dawgs!
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Jan 20, 2011

Get to Know a D-Bag: Arizona

The Dawgs have a huge game tonight as the #25 Arizona Wildcats come into town with the Pac-10 lead on the line. UW is 5-1 in the conference (13-4 overall) while AZ is 4-1 (15-3). The 'Cats are good: their only losses have been an 8-point defeat at #2 Kansas, a blowout at #9 BYU (Jimmah!), and a 1-point loss at Oregon St.

The Wildcats are led by the projected Pac-10 player of the year, Derrick Williams (though maybe IT can snag it if he keeps ripping off games of 27 points/13 assists). This D-Will is a 6'8 sophomore power forward who averages 19.7 points and 7.3 rebounds per game. He's a monster in the paint, so the Husky bigs are going to have to play great defense to limit him to a modest game as well as draw some fouls on the big man. When the 'Cats played in Hec Ed last year, Williams fouled out in only 8 minutes of play.

Where is my Shrek mask?! Oh never mind, Derrick's wearing it...

During my search for that Shrek pic, I came across this beauty that was too good not to post:

"Hey honey, let's make our unattractiveness work for us this year!"

Luckily, the Huskies won't be facing an Arizona team with Nic Wise running the point for the first time in like 11 years. His brother, Dondre, is still on the team, but fortunately, he's terrible.

The Dawgs should be able to dominate in guard play and hopefully IT keeps his hot streak going with another 20/10 type game. A win would announce the Huskies as the undisputed leader in the conference while a loss would put Arizona in the driver's seat for the Pac-10 title.

Obviously, this is a huge game (probably the biggest of the year so far), but I can't help but feeling that the Washington/Arizona rivalry doesn't quite have the same fire that it did back when Brandon Roy was battling Hasan Adams and Lute Olsen was screaming from the Wildcat bench.

Lute always had the tannest upper thighs in the Pac-10.

Now the Wildcats are coached by a poor man's Jimmy Kimmel, Sean Miller. After trips to the Elite Eight and Sweet Sixteen in his last two years as the coach of Xavier, Miller took over the reigns at Arizona and struggled last season (16-15) in a difficult transition year. He's been able to continue U of A's tradition of bringing in big-time talent and it appears that Arizona will return to the top of the conference under his stewardship.

 Plus few rock slacks harder than Sean.

But don't get me wrong, Sean has a LONG way to go before he ever approaches Romar's level of style:

"Just a little tracksuit snow run, no bigs."

I expect the Dawg Pack to put on their best performance of the season (be sure to check out the Dawg Pack Dirt: Arizona) and propel the Huskies to a close victory. Call it 82-79 for the good guys.

Go Dawgs!
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Jan 17, 2011

Back on Track

After being mired in rumors about off-the-court issues all week and suffering a disappointing loss at Stanford on Thursday, the 2010-2011 UW basketball team faced a season crossroads of sorts against Cal on Sunday night. Would they succumb to adversity? Or would they push through these challenges and get their season back on track?

With a 92-71 win over the Golden Bears, the Huskies sent a resounding message that they are still the dominant team they appeared to be earlier in the year as well as the most dangerous squad in the Pac-10.

Isaiah Thomas may have had his best game as a Husky. The John Wooden Award Midseason Finalist had 27 points and 13 assists - an awesome stat line at the NBA level (with 8 more minutes and much higher point totals) and an absurdly fresh state line for a college player.

IT abused more Bears than Ol' Lilly.

Since IT took over point guard duties for the injured Abdul Gaddy, he's averaging 9.25 assists per game - by far the best APG average in Division 1. Even though he's only played point guard exclusively for four games, Thomas leads the Pac-10 in assists with 92.

MBA also had a great game in picking up his 6th double-double of the year with 22 points and 11 boards. Bryan-Amaning disappeared down the stretch against the Cardinal, so it was very reassuring to see him bounce back with one of his best games of the year versus Cal.

"No Hyphens score in my paint!"

The final member of the Big Three on Sunday was Justin Holiday. J-Hol scored a career-high 23 points on 9/14 from the field, including 5/8 from deep...remember when Holiday couldn't shoot threes? IT, MBA, and Holiday outscored Cal themselves 72-71.


It was also entertaining to see Cal coach Mike Montgomery absorb this beating. He's my favorite coach in the conference to watch lose. I'm not sure why exactly -  he gets pretty animated which annoys me, but I think it's mostly because he looks more like a Bernie Madoff associate than a basketball coach.

"I swear I don't even know what a Ponzi scheme is!"

It was also the first time I got to see Bak² play on TV. He didn't do much, but I got to say his name a bunch of times, so that was exciting.

The Dawgs are back on top of the conference at 5-1 and have a huge game coming up against 4-1 Arizona on Thursday at Hec Ed. If the Huskies can take care of the Wildcats, they will firmly supplant themselves as the Top Dawgs in the Pac-10.

Go Dawgs!

Photos by AP Photo/Marcio Jose Sanchez.
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Jan 15, 2011

"Duck Upon a Time" by Sarkisianity

After reading the comment, What in the fuck does this have to do with Oregon sucking?” by Anonymous on the Stanford recap post, Sarkisianity felt compelled to change into his sneakers and zippered cardigan sweater and spin a yarn about the origins of the Oregon duck:

Dude, everything has to do with Oregon sucking. Let me tell you a little tale...

The state of Whoregon was created long, long ago when the Washington State went on a bender and drank a shit-ton of boilermakers. The next morning, Washington awoke hungover as fuck, stumbled into the bathroom and dropped the gnarliest deuce known to mankind, animal-kind, and state-kind. Seriously, the thing looked like a cross between a landfill and a mushroom cloud. It smelled even worse.

So Washington, quite impressed/disgusted with himself at this point, flushes the damn thing down the drain and forgets about it. What Washington doesn't realize is that the crap he just dropped wasn't finished. It wanted its own life. So it traveled south and met some hippies that had started a commune. The shit and the hippies went on for quite some time, just smoking weed and enjoying the spoils of free love.

Years later, the deuce decided to make something of himself and started a school. He looked to Washington and saw grand institutions of higher education and athletic dominance. He wanted one of those. The conniving bastard that he was, he realized he couldn't produce one the old fashioned way. So, he set out on a journey to find the biggest, ugliest sugar daddy he could. That's where Philip Hampson Knight enters our little tale.

Philip was a scrawny kid with patchwork facial hair. As a child, he enjoyed competing with the younger boys in the neighborhood. He would challenge them to a footrace. The loser had to kiss the winner. Phil always won, the sick fuck.

The shit met Phil when he was 18 years old. He knew immediately that he'd met his cash cow. All he had to do was seduce him. It took but one night of Pina Coladas and Sex on the Beach shooters for the two to fall in love. Phil went on to create a monstrosity of a corporation. By employing small Asian children, their profit margins shot through the roof. These monies were then funneled into the athletic facilities of the school that the crap had created.

"We'll call them the Ducks!" the shit exclaimed.

The facilities had all the bells and whistles (Phil knew what high school kids loved). Shortly thereafter they had a brief taste of success. Their plan was succeeding.

"MORE MONEY!" the deuce cried.

Phil eagerly poured in more blood money.

Their exploits on the football field continued to grow. Then, suddenly, they hit a snag. Their team had hit a plateau. "What could it be?" the deuce wondered.


He set his minions to work, creating new athletic wear. The uniforms were so hideous that three different nations exiled Phil from their borders. When they were finished he proudly showed them to the deuce. They outfitted their team in the new creations...but the stagnation continued.

“NEWER UNIFORMS!” Phil declared.

Three more exiles and two years later, the new gear was done. They introduced them, along with a new coach for their team. Their success grew. Phil and the deuce attributed it all to the uniforms. They won game after game. Finally, they had done it. Phil and shit were madly in love.

You don't get to this level of creepiness without thoroughly pimping out the third world.

Then finally, they broke through. They were winning every game! They had been so strategic and worked Asian children so hard to get to this point! Legitimacy was finally in their grasp. Phil knew what he had to do.

He repeated his mantra, “spend more money, build more facilities, create new uniforms!”

The season unfolded with every piece falling into place.

Finally, it was upon them. One final test. One opponent between them and destiny. Then, on January 10th, 2011, the unthinkable happened. All the money, all the child labor, all the new facilities had failed them. Their dreams were shattered and they slunk back into the night.

“Maybe you can’t buy tradition and glory,” they thought. "Maybe we’ll always just be a pile of shit and a rich, creepy old man."


Creepy photo of Phil Knight provided by Steve Dykes/Getty Images and Phil Knight's creepy face.
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Jan 14, 2011


That just about sums up the loss at Stanford on Thursday. The Dawgs blocked out their off the court distractions and built a 11-point lead in the 2nd half against the Cardinal only to come spectacularly unglued ala Denny Green and lose 58-56.

In some ways, it's good this one wasn't televised. It was clearly UW's worst game of the year: only 56 points, 36% shooting from the field, 14 turnovers to 11 assists, and 50% from the line. Whack shit.

A lot can be made that the Huskies miserable performance is due to the criminal allegations hanging over the program. I'm sure this was a major distraction and had an effect on the game, but I think the team also just laid a stinker (always a possibility on the road) and the combination of these two elements led to a much less talent Stanford team picking up the win.

The Dawgs fall to 4-1 in the Pac-10 and must regroup for a big game at Cal on Sunday night. If UW loses, the chatter about how the accusations are hurting the team will hit a fever pitch.

Hopefully the ongoing investigation will result in a clear picture of what happened last Saturday and the proper actions will be taken. There is really no reason to speculate right now as we simply don't know the facts and presuming wrongdoing without the necessary information is not fair to the accused nor the victim.

Let's root hard for a UW victory on Sunday to get this season back on track.

Go Dawgs!

Photo by AP Photo/Paul Sakuma.
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Jan 13, 2011

Lots of Facebook Content

Sorry I couldn't squeeze out a Get to Know a D-Bag: Stanford in time, guys. Really busy week. I did throw some stuff up on the TheDawgDude Facebook Page though if you want to check that out.

I'd be honored if you become a fan on FB, follow TheDawgDude on Twitter, buy TDD gear, walk my dog, paint my house, satisfy my wife sexually, etc.

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Jan 11, 2011

End of the College Football Season

It's always a very sad time of the year when college football ends. Luckily the season finished up as well as possible with UW's surprisingly domination in the Holiday Bowl and the ducks crapping all over themselves in the NC. Throw in Chris Polk returning for the 2011 season and all is good in Husky Nation.

We should make sure to congratulate the ducks on 3rd place. Nice work!

Go ahead and add this trophy to your impressive collection:

Oh...I forgot. My bad.

In the spirit of cleaning out all of the Oregon jokes, it looks like Darron Thomas' two interceptions last night weren't the only picks he had in the game:

There has to be a little passing accuracy up there...

With a ton of starters (and Polk) returning next year, the future is bright for Husky Football. A bowl game is definitely attainable for this team even while breaking in a new quarterback.

Onto basketball season! Go Dawgs!
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Jan 10, 2011

Auburn Wins!

That's an interesting jersey cut...

Don't worry ducks, you get to spend the rest of time thinking "what if?" 

If you want to see a National Championship trophy, just drive north up I-5 (shout-out to Matt Lund on that one).

235 days 'til the Huskies open the 2011 season!

Go Dawgs!

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Giant Douche vs. a Turd Sandwich

"Hey doctor, could you make them look just a little faker?"

It's the old "Giant Douche vs. a Turd Sandwich" scenario as Oregon takes on Auburn in the National Championship. The Tigers are from the nauseatingly arrogant SEC conference and feature a Heisman-winning quarterback who was involved in some shady dealings regarding his commitment to the school.

In almost any other circumstances, I would advise rooting against Auburn, but look over on the other side of the field and lo and behold, it's the Giant Douch of the Nike/Oregon, pimp/ho partnership. Obviously this website has gone to great lengths to explain why the ducks suck to such extreme levels that one requires a Hazmat suit within a 30-mile radius of Eugene to keep the toxic duck douchiness from burrowing in and infesting one's soul.

Could a poacher pop out and gun them both down?

I would be lying if I said that listening to professional SEC knob-polishers, Urban Meyer and Nick Saban, prattle on about how Auburn will beat the ducks didn't spark a twinge of Pac-10 pride deep within me. It's just a damn shame that Stanford didn't hang on to their early lead in Eugene and we could all root for the Tree against the Tigers instead of the feathered Shitbirds from Phil Knight's School of Corporately Funded Amateur Sports.

Oh, and why is Urban Meyer constantly on ESPN now? Aren't you supposed to be spending time with your family there, Urb?

So unfortunately this is a "pick the lesser" evil situation, but make no mistake, the lesser evil is Auburn. The lifetime of irritation we'd have to endure from duck fans screaming about their "natty" thoroughly offsets any added respect the Pac-10 would get from having a team win it all.

It's not quite a "War Eagle" but close enough.

So try to set aside your SEC hate for a game and root for Cam "The $180,000 Kid" Newton to squash the hopes and dreams of the most despicable fanbase in the nation.

Go Tigers!
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Jan 8, 2011

Dawgs Slay Beavs, Hawks Crap on New Orleans

The Huskies shrugged off a sluggish first half and buried the Beavers with 63 2nd half points en route to a 103-72 victory. The Dawgs are now 4-0 in Pac-10 play and hold their longest Pac-10 winning streak (11) since 1953-54. Hot goddamn.

MBA was a dominant force inside, scoring 24 points and grabbing 15 rebounds. After all the shit that Bryan-Amaning has taken, let's make sure to give him props for performances like these (not to mention him being Pac-10 Player of the Week last week).

Impressively awkward photo.

IT had another big game captaining the Husky offense. Thomas had 19 points and 8 assists - a stat line that should become more and more familiar as UW relies on IT to run the offense with Gaddy injured. T-Buckets continued his hot streak with 14 points and 7 boards.

It's crazy that the Dawgs can look pretty bad for a half, but end up with 103 points and a 31-point win. That sound you're hearing is the rest of the Pac-10 covering their assholes.

Next up for the Huskies is a Bay Area business trip next weekend. UW visits Stanford on Thursday before heading to Berkeley on Sunday to take on the Cal Bears. With a sweep down there, a record-setting 18-0 Pac-10 record becomes more of a realistic possibility.

Obviously this is a Husky sports site, but I have to give props to the Seattle Seahawks today. While the point spreading was enormous against the Saints (10-11 points, one of the highest in playoffs history), there were a lot of factors going in the Hawks direction: Saints traveling cross country on a short-week, Matt Hasselback healing up over the last few weeks, and the Seahawks having one of their best games running the ball all year against the Rams last Sunday.

With that all said, it was going to take a helluva performance for the Hawks to win and fortunately for us fans, they didn't disappoint. After falling in a quick 10-0 hole, the Seahawk offense played their best ball in years. Hasselback ripped the Super Bowl champs for 272 yards and 4 touchdowns.

But the biggest play of the game was the 67-yard touchdown run by former Cal star and Predator lookalike, Marshawn Lynch. This may be the greatest run in Seahawks history and is certainly one of the best runs in NFL playoff history:

Unreal. Lynch certainly earned his BEAST MODE nickname with that one. Here's a close up of Marshawn stiff-arming Tracy Porter across the field.

Congrats to the Seahawks for proving the doubters wrong and being the most successful 8-9 team in NFL history. Playing in Atlanta or Chicago is going to be tough, but with Hasselback, Lynch, and the offense playing at today's level, anything is possible. Oh, and if the Hawks win next weekend and Green Bay win their next two games, the NFC Championship will be held at Qwest.

Go Dawgs! (And Hawks!)
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Dawgs Slap ducks, Prepare for Beaver Waxing

The Huskies struggled with the loss of Abdul Gaddy for 3/4 of the game before taking control and putting the ducks in their rightful place. Fortunately, this Oregon squad would struggle to make the top three in the Metro high school division.

Terrence Ross torched the ducks for 25 points on 11-18 shooting. T-Buckets (*Jerry Brewer nickname) is quickly becoming a star as a freshman. Ross doesn't just fill up the basket, he also had 4 steals, 3 blocks, and 4 boards.

IT had another brilliant game - 20 points, 9 assists, 6 rebounds, 3 steals, and simply took control of the game midway through the 2nd half. One positive of Gaddy's injury is that Thomas will now have to focus more on running the offense and looking to pass. When IT goes into pass-first mode, but stays aggressive, he's the best guard in the conference.

Here are some Ross-centric highlights:

Now the Huskies prepare to go 4-0 in the Pac-10 with a Saturday afternoon game against the Beavs of Oregon State. The Beavers struggled in their non-conference schedule (losses to Montana, Utah Valley, Texas Southern, and Seattle U.), but rebounded with a home sweep of the Arizona schools last weekend.

How will UW counter Oregon State's vaunted slap-fight defense?

The Beavs are led by sophomore guard Jared Cunningham (14.1 ppg) and senior guard Calvin Haynes (11.2 ppg), I swear Haynes has been playing for the Beavers for like 7 years. We'll see what Craig "I'm not my sister!" Robinson comes up with to slow down UW's high-powered offense. I expect to see OSU to play a lot of zone and try to turn the game into a half-court contest.

Unfortunately for the Beavs, they simply don't have the talent to match up with UDub. There will be more ugly stretches like in the Oregon game, but the Dawgs will run enough to get the win (prediction: 85-67) and move to 4-0 in conference play.

Go Dawgs!

Game photos by AP Photo/Elaine Thompson.
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Jan 6, 2011

Get to Know the D-Bag of D-Bags: Oregon

Oregon coach Dana Altman drags his sorry excuse for a Pac-10 basketball team into Hec-Ed Thursday night for a what should be a severe and unmerciful beating at the hands of the far more talented and much deeper Dawgs.

If you don't have a Husky Humper shirt, now is definitely the time.

While there our signs that this could potentially be a trap game; the Huskies coming off the huge sweep in LA, Abdul Gaddy going down for the season on Wednesday, Oregon being the weakest team in the conference, etc, I expect the Huskies to stay focused and drill the ducks right in their poop-stained bills.

While Gaddy's absence shouldn't be a big issue for the Huskies against Oregon and Oregon St. this week, his injury is a major blow to UW's chances of making a deep tourney run in March.

I miss you already.

Keep your head up, Abdul. Your UW career is far from over.

Hopefully Venoy Overton steps his game up as well as one (or more) of the Three-Headed Wing Monster (Terrence Ross, C.J. Wilcox, and Scott Suggs). I expect Ross to see increased playing time this week and hopefully he responds with games like his gem against USC.

But back to the Nike University Shitbirds. The green & piss sport the Pac-10's worst record at 7-7 and are currently riding a 4-game losing streak. The only common opponent between the Huskies and ducks is Virginia: Oregon lost by 15, UW won by 43. But don't let that stat fool you, Altman's high post offense will score at will against the Huskies no matter what defense we throw at them. I mean, just watch his DVD:

#181,241 in Movies & TV on Amazon!

A post about Oregon bball would not be complete without a photo of their new basketball court at Matthew Knight Arena (I wonder who built that...):

This court definitively answers the question: if a tree shits in the woods, will people see it? So this is what a Douglas Fir abortion looks like! I'm excited for the Huskies to get "[Balls] Deep In The Woods." Okay, I think three is enough.

Hopefully the Huskies crushing Oregon on Thursday will be a harbinger for a duck loss against Auburn as I don't feel like vomiting all Monday night if the Tigers lose that game.

Oh, and remember that here at TheDawgDude.com, we always appreciate photo submissions of duck fans looking like idiots. This is exactly what I'm talking about:

I hope your Christmas was WHOREible.

I'm predicting Ross to drop 17 and the Huskies to run Oregon out of Hec-Ed 84-61.

Lastly, it is now very clear that Bo Pelini is a Grade A asshole.

Go Dawgs!
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Jan 4, 2011

Campaign for Jake to Hoist the 12th Man Flag

There is growing support out there for former Husky QB/superstar human, Jake Locker, to hoist the 12th Man Flag on Saturday at the Seahawks/Saints playoff game. Join this Facebook group to help the cause and make this happen:

Little known fact: Jake wears his full game clothes and carries a football wherever he goes.

The precedent for Huskies raising the 12th Man Flag has certainly been set with Don James, Lorenzo Romar, Tim Lincecum, and Chuck Nelson all receiving this honor. After spending five highly-scrutinized years working his butt off for the UW program and becoming the most famous amateur athlete in this state in quite some time, Jake certainly qualifies to hoist the 12th Man Flag.

Oh, and if you tell me that Locker shouldn't get this honor because he's not a "Seahawk Legend", remember that these two goofjobs have hoisted the flag: Kenny Mayne and Drew Carey.

UPDATE: the idea to have the rest of the UW seniors hoist the flag with Jake is a great idea as well. Let's make this happen, Seahawks Promotions Department. If I see Sanjaya (Federal Way) or some other assclown raise the flag on Saturday, I'm going to be pissed.

Let's show Jake some love!

Photo of Jake Locker by John Keatley for Men's Health.

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Jan 2, 2011

Caption Contest Winner!

Congrats to loyal TDD reader and upper tier snarky asshole, Isaac "Cam" Newton, for winning the Holiday Bowl Caption Contest with this beauty:

"Nebraska's soberest defensive player" was the most challenging item on the sorority scavenger hunt.
"Cam" was the winner with 31.8% of the vote and will be rewarded with a complimentary TDD t-shirt. Thanks to Travis Erickson and Dave Moore (2nd and 3rd place, respectively) and to everyone else who submitted - we'll definitely do more caption contests in the future.

Also, still waiting to hear from Laura Lunde to claim her prize for nearly predicting Polk's rushing yards in the Holiday Bowl (3 yards off).

Go Dawgs!
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